Our client’s
agendas vary quite dramatically, however there are some fundamental
concepts that seem to recur regardless of whether our client is an
aggressive entrepreneur, a budding artist, a business executive, or
a working mother.
Building
Reserves, Expanding Margin
A common theme with our clients regardless of background or agenda
is the realization that they might be operating with little or no
margin and have inadequate reserves of time, energy, patience, money
or space of any kind. Expanding reserves and margin reduces stress,
increases satisfaction and begins to eliminate a lifestyle that requires
a constant flow of adrenaline to continue operating.
What
You Focus On, Grows
Over and over we observe what seems to be simple and obvious but difficult
to execute. Once an individual eliminates energy drains, clears out
mental and physical clutter, consciously chooses one or two things
to focus on in their life, they get results. We help them work on
their “belief” that this can and will occur. Most people
have not had the courage to let go of other extraneous efforts and
commitments.
Try
Absolute Yes
Living in the richest country in the world has created enormous opportunity
and unlimited choices. One of the ways we challenge our clients to
deal with this “option-glut” is to begin moving toward
“absolute yes” where the criteria for making commitments
of any kind involves careful consideration and asks the question “Is
what I am committing time, energy, or resources to an absolute yes
for me?” Try it.
Go
Ahead, Be Counter-Culture
A recent client
example best demonstrates this one. Check out this affluent family’s
bold moves.
- No cable TV,
one TV in household
- No buying in to the latest Disney movie theme hype, beanie babies,
Happy Meals, etc.
- Family dresses for church on Sunday, eats dinner together 4 nights
per week. Firm.
- Teenagers will not get car and cell phone automatically upon turning
16
- No $100 dollar tennis shoes or any “Britney Spears”
look alike styles
- No hair color, tattoos or piercing allowed for kids. Period.
- No video games
The family cooks
together, rides bikes, takes walks, goes to the library for books,
makes crafts, does journaling. No traveling soccer or baseball allowed-
One local sport and one other activity like piano or art class if
desired.
You get the idea.
Whether you’re single, single parent, or married consider going
“counter-culture” and see what happens when….
Know
How Your Battery Recharges
At any age it isn’t unusual for someone to be fairly unclear
about what it is that truly recharges their battery. We encourage
our clients to clarify, understand and practice the activities, (besides
sleep) that actually help them to rejuvenate, refresh, restore creativity
and maintain a positive attitude.
If
You Don’t Acknowledge It, Your Body Will
In her book “Finding Your Own North Star” (which we highly
recommend!) Martha Beck discusses the social self and the essential
self. The social self is the conforming, hard working, predictable,
planning-oriented you that is tied to the external ideals of doing
the right thing. The essential self is the real you that is not focused
on social conventions and represents what your heart and soul want.
When the “essential self” is not honored, your body and
behavior will find a way to get your attention. Many times that includes
headaches, stomach distress, extreme fatigue, chronic colds and even
self-sabatoge. If we build lifestyles or workstyles that don’t
serve us,(or stop serving us) our body will tell us about it. Some
of our behaviors (that may surprise you) may begin to signal that
the essential self needs to be heard and acknowledged.